“Originally appeared in BIZCATALYST360, Feb 21, 2020(edited).”
Drive: Be teachable with peace because my thoughts and emotions do not define me.
McLean, Harvard’s Medical School’s Affiliate
Emotional Hijacking – at Work and Home
Shares in September 2020, that even though depression and anxiety may not seem like criteria for an employer to be concerned about; yet, the reality is that mental health can have a critical impact on a company’s bottom line. Particular issues that can arise are due to financial stress and the exhaustion that comes with time commitments for leaders.
According to data supplied by the American Psychiatric Association:
- Employees with unresolved depression experience a 35% reduction in productivity
- Contributing to a loss to the US economy of $210.5 billion a year in absenteeism
- Reducing productivity
- Increasing medical costs
According to the Gottman’s Institute
Relationship troubles begin when one partner shuts out the other from their inner world. It’s destructive to the relationship and seldom done intentionally. Yet, unfortunately, if not understood can be very destructive.
The first step is to Pause
The first and most vital step to acknowledging difficult emotional feelings – consciously pause and turn inward
When a person has uncomfortable feelings brewing within them, anxiety, anger, sadness, fear, disgust, shame, or guilt, their first and most vital step is to acknowledge they have difficult emotional feelings. Pause, reflect, acknowledge, accept what is happening, and take at least a 30-60 minute break before emotional hijacking takes over. Dismissing and stuffing can cause further conflict and resentment onto themselves and within relationships.
According to Mark Debinski, President and Founder of Bluewater Advisory
“90% of the difference between star performers and average performers in senior leadership positions is EQ.” Leaders at successful companies tend to have very high emotional intelligence(EQ). This intelligence helps them to successfully lead and grow companies exponentially in size, while seemingly possessing the ability always to make the right decision at the right time.
The Gottman Institute – leaders of relationship health
Shares that the science behind what drives couples to lose their emotional connection can be quite complex. One simple strategy that can help couples reconnect they created is called An Emotional Bank Account. An emotional bank account is similar to making deposits into a mutual fund or any financial investment account. However, the difference is emotional validations, turning towards, positive bids and other emotional investments are being made. By doing so, when trouble arises, a couple can make a withdrawal which helps in better and healthier management of uncomfortable situations. Coaching and counseling are great opportunities to learn and practice these strategies and techniques.
The ability to manage multiple feelings at once is called Emotional Agility.
Feeling vulnerable leads to learning how to manage emotional hijacking
Even though practicing vulnerability may feel uncomfortable, understanding and practicing how to be vulnerable is what teaches us how to manage emotional hijacking. Be kind to ourselves. Accept that sometimes this good person, at times, has difficult thoughts and feelings. They will pass, with time. It will be okay.
'be renewed in the spirit of your minds' - Ephesians 4:23
Sara